A Sure Way of Making Enemies

You can tell people they are wrong by a look or an intonation or a gesture just as eloquently as you can in words – and if you tell them they are wrong, do you make them want to agree with you? Never! For you have struck a different blow at their intelligence, judgement, pride and self-respect. That will make them want to strike back. But it will never make them want to change their minds. You may then hurl at them all the logic of a Plato or an Immanuel Kant, but you will not alter their opinions, for you have hurt their feelings.

Never begin by announcing “I’m going to prove so-and-so to you.” That’s bad. That’s tantamount to saying: I’m smarter than you are. I’m going to tell you a thing or two and make you change your mind. 

That is a challenge. It arouses opposition and makes the listener want to battle with you before you even start.

It is difficult, under even the most benign conditions, to change people’s minds. So why make it harder? Why handicap yourself?

If you are going to prove anything, don’t let anybody know it. Do it subtly, so adroitly, that no one will feel that you are doing it.

Courtesy: Dale Carnegie

You...

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating;
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise


If you can dream – and not make dreams your master,
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same,
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken,
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build em up with worn-out tools;


If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginning
And never breath a word about your loss,
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the will which says to them: ‘Hold On!”


If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue
Or walk with kings-nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it
And which is more – you’ll be a man, my son!

Children Learn What They Live

If a child lives with criticism,

He learns to condemn.

If a child lives with praise,

He learns to appreciate.

If a child lives with hostility,

He learns to fight.

If a child lives with tolerance,

He learns to be patient.

If a child lives with ridicule,

He learns to be shy.

If a child lives with encouragement,

He learns confidence.

If a child lives with shame,

He learns to feel guilty.

If a child learns with approval,

He learns to like himself.

If a child lives with fairness,

He learns justice.

If a child lives with security,

He learns to have faith.

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship,

He learns to find love in the world.

Secret of a Successful Business Interview

There is no mystery about successful business intercourse. Exclusive attention to the person who is speaking to you is very important. Nothing else is so flattering as that. 

-Charles W Eliot.

‘Eliot himself was a past master of the art of listening. His listening was not mere silence, but a form of activity. Sitting very erect on the end of his spine with hands joined in his lap, making no movement except that he revolved his thumbs around each other faster or slower, he faced his interlocutor and seemed to be hearing with his eyes as well as his ears. He listened with his mind and attentively considered what you had to say while you said it… At the end of an interview the person who had talked to him felt that he had his say.”

-Henry James,

Novelist

Successfully Selling Trust

We don’t attempt to compete price-wise, but we can more than compete service-wise. Consumers always go back to people they can trust. Think about it for a moment. All of us like to do business with people we can trust. Can you imagine going to a doctor and not having any confidence that the treatment is any good? Can you imagine doing business with a financial institution whose trustworthiness was suspect? Could you be happy with a mate you do not trust? No way.

 The same rule applies in selling. If people really trust you, if everything else is even closer to being equal, they will do business with you.

 There are five reasons people will not buy from you:

1. No need
2. No money
3. No hurry
4. No desire
5. No trust

The best of the five – No Trust – is the most difficult to understand and the most fundamental to possess. The only way to separate personal rejection from business refusal – when the prospect says no – is to understand the importance of TRUST in the sales relationship. People MUST trust you before they buy from you, and if you are not the right kind of person, people will not buy your goods on service.

Courtesy: Zig Ziglar

In Control of Attitudes…

• If you lose control, you lose. Period.

• Only people who manage their attitude avoid being managed by others.

• Anytime you have contact with anyone, you broadcast your disposition through facial expression, tone of voice, posture, handshakes, handwriting, voice-mail message, decision-making, managing, leading and the rest.

• Emotional strengths, not intellectual strengths, are what are most required to get to the top.

• The higher up you go, the more critical it is to control your disposition. Subordinates will watch and study your inclinations and then match theirs to yours. By controlling your disposition, you can literally affect their performance as your own.

      

Smile, Reach Out & Be Successful…

Whenever you go out-of-doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of head high, and fill the lungs to the utmost; drink in the sunshine; greet your friends with a smile, and put soul into every handclasp. Do not fear being misunderstood and do not waste a minute thinking about your enemies.

Try to fix firmly in your mind what you would like to do; and then, without veering off direction, you will move straight to the goal. Keep your mind on the great and splendid things you would like to do; and then, as the days go gliding away, you will find yourself unconsciously seizing upon the opportunities that are required for the fulfillment of your desire. Just as the coral insect takes from the running tide the element it needs.

Picture in your mind the able, earnest, useful person you desire to be, and the thought you hold is hourly transforming you into that particular individual. Thought is supreme. Preserve a right mental attitude – the attitude of courage, frankness, and good cheer.

To think rightly is to create. All things come through desire and every sincere prayer is answered. We become like that on which our hearts are fixed. Carry your chin in and the crown of your head high. We are gods in the chrysalis.

: Elbert Hubbard